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I wonder if people who don’t know what real estate is think that there’s a lot of well dressed women for sale.

How authentic can an Italian restaurant be if the music playlist goes from Jamie Foxx’s “Blame it on the Alcohol,” to Miley Cyrus’ “Party in the USA,” to something by the Black Eyed Peas, to “Airplanes” by Paramore…..(i was in this place tonight).

I wonder if people know how much of a douchebag they are when they refer to a waitress as “The Help.”

I wonder if people know what a leap of faith it is to believe that Jesus was a white guy.

What if dogs had mustaches?

I bet my kids will make fun of their DVR, HD3D TV and 500 channels in the same way I would have made fun of my parents if we only had a black and white television when I grew up.

Why don’t we have consumer grade personal aircraft available yet? You know, so I could fly from my house to work in the same kind of structure that I drive now. I mean…I bet there were people that fought against letting lots of people drive saying it would be a threat to public safety…..but that’s why you need road signs, licenses and all that stuff to mitigate the risks. So yeah….can we get some flying cars around here soon please?

How did people become so susceptible to marketing ploys….like when they renamed the “Estate Tax” which had overwhelming support, to the “Death Tax” which had overwhelming opposition, even when the actual tax never changed at all.

I really would like a Doner Kebab. Anyone knowing where I could get one in the triangle area would receive 1000 thank yous and my eternal appreciation.

I don’t really drink alcohol anymore. Melody has a wine or a beer with dinner, but I’m not really inclined to drink at all anymore, even when we go out. Not sure why….just don’t feel the need or desire anymore. I do remember really liking Captain Morgan and Ginger Ale though. Or a good Bourbon and Coke. I might need to get some training in soon though, with a wedding coming up for a good friend that will inevitably involve an awesome reception.

I really should look into earning some more money by teaching some technology classes. I just finished a day of teaching some teachers how to get more out of their computers, and mainly how to use Google Apps (their school-system provides email through Google Apps). Surely there’s opportunity in Raleigh or the triangle area for me to do that without too much effort.

It’s been way too long since Melody and I went on a vacation. The last vacation we went on was…..I have no idea. It may have been our trip to Australia in 2007. The closest thing to a vacation i can remember was today, when we walked on the beach for 45 minutes before driving back (after being at the beach to teach the teachers).

Why isn’t there an easier version of golf for people who suck too much at the real game, but still love being outside and hitting the crap out of a small round object. I mean…what if you let someone throw a golf ball, and then roll it once they are on the green. I think that would be popular. Kind of like Disc Golf, but even easier.

What if dogs could talk. Cat’s would be pissed!

Wonder if one-humped camels get ridiculed by two humped camels.

What came first? Annorexia, or fashion/entertainment magazines?

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.

Why isn’t 5 afraid of 7? Because he lives next to 6 but they don’t talk.

This is how i picture how cigarettes came to be: some guy sees this nice green and yellow leafy plant and says…hey….it looks nice……so he tries to eat it……but it tastes like crap….so he says to himself….okay…i’ll leave it out in the sun for a really long time to see if it gets any better…….and so he does….and comes back and is like hrmm……it looks all dry….lemme taste it again…..nope still crappy……..so then he says…..well……what if i burn it, but instead of keeping my face out of the smoke, i’ll put my face and open mouth right on it……..then after all the coughing, which i hear is what happens to every first time smoker, he says….gee….that really hurt my eyes, my nose, my throat…..lemme hit that again!…….so now he has a face and lung full of smoke, and is still hacking up from the smoke……but some other guy sees this and says….gee……that doesn’t look good at all…..what if i put a piece of some filtery type of material in between that guy’s face and the smoke….maybe it will make him less likely to cough so much and not want to put his face in the smoke……THEN…..after a while…people still aren’t really putting their faces in the smoke still….so some guy says to his friends……why don’t we put some more chemicals in there to make people so addicted to the smoke, that they’ll ignore the whole coughing and hacking pain, and continue to stick their faces in it……and they all agree to do that……and for some reason no one seems to bat an eye at the types of stuff they are putting in….like gasoline, and acids and things like that…not even the scientists stop to ask “hrmm…..why are we trying so damn hard to make people want to put smoke into their bodies”……yeah….that’s how i picture the genesis of the cigarette…..i bet it’s 100% accurate…..i should post it to wikipedia.

I wonder if the first people didn’t really understand facial hair and so they thought the hair on their head was growing through and out the front of their face. I also wonder if they were confused as to why it didn’t grow into their mouths or out their ears at the same rate.

Aren’t all hardback books paperbacks too? I know paperbacks aren’t hardbacks, but the opposite isn’t true.

Did Alexander Graham Bell play with two cups and a piece of string when he was little?

If they invented a clear type of dirt, it would be so much easier to know when to pick carrots and potatoes.

Why do people who consider themselves Pro-Life also support the Death Penalty?

Because of the conflicting ideas about certain things, it’s impossible for all religions to be correct. But if any single religion is correct, then that means there’s a whole lot of people that are wrong.

Do people still believe in the Greek or Roman gods? I mean…is there still a group of people worshiping Zeus? If not…when did that stop?

Do you think Buddha wishes he lost the weight before he got famous and posed for all those carvings and statues?

Remember when we all thought “Google” was the stupidest name ever, and that it would never catch on?

I wonder if they make crossword puzzle books where the square colors are reversed, just to tap into that market of people who REALLY like using white-out/corrective fluid pens.

What if birds had four legs…that would look friggin awesome.

Isn’t everyone a “touch” typist? I haven’t heard of anyone able to use a keyboard without actually touching it.

If someone started building a bullet train tunnel from Los Angeles to Hawaii, and from Hawaii to Brisbane, then by the time i retire, I’d be able to tell Melody “Hell no I’m not taking a damn train under the sea!”

If i became a zombie, all this blogging would really have been for nothing. Damn that’s depressing.

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