As Nick mentioned, I have had a couple of bad days.  I had several very nauseous spells that were really awful.  I don’t think anyone likes to be nauseous, but to be honest, I usually do okay with it.  The past few days, I have been terrified of vomiting because my incision is quite large and it hurts.  It hurts even more when you add vomiting.  The strain on my incision just simply hurts.  On Friday, I got an awful headache that was quickly heading to nauseousness.  The meds the Nurse gave me did not stop me from feeling sick, and I struggled for quite awhile.  I had an even worse nauseous battle on Saturday morning at around 3:30.  Luckily, the night nurse was awesome.  Lorilyn gave me the same meds the previous nurse gave me.  Of course, they did not help me, and I started to vomit and moan, cry, etc.  She heard me a return to my room immediately.  She was very proactive and call the doctor immediately to see if she could give me something else.  She did not realize that Dr. B had give us permission to call him and not the on-call doctor, so she spoke with Dr. On-Call.  He allowed her to give me the new meds, which helped me sleep and stopped the nauseousness.  The new stuff unfortunately made me very tired for about 10 hours.  (It was like being shot with a tranquilizer dart, but I am not complaining–it truly saved me.)

When Dr. B came in to check on me on Saturday, he prescribed a med for me to take to prevent nauseousness.  I explained to him that I really had no appetite, and I thought it had a lot to do with the nauseousness.  I asked him if he would allow me to bring in non-hospital food to eat, and  he said that was fine.  I seriously considered kissing him full on the mouth.  I really think the outside food made me feel better.  I was finally able to get some of my strength back when I was allowed to have good, tasty food.  (I’m not knocking the hospital food, but it was not great for me; they listed me as “vegetarian and picky”.  I think the Peanut Butter and Banana Milkshake that my Dad got me from Cook-out was really key to the new and improved me yesterday.  Also, I did not take any percocet yesterday because I am convinced that it and my empty stomach was what made me so sick.

Yesterday was pretty good.

The general surgery, who did a portion of my surgery, deemed by bowels well enough to go home today.  (I’m going to call the General Surgery by the name of Dr. Colon because I don’t know his real name and he worked on my colon.  Sorry Dr. Colon; I’m usually really good with names, but you introduced yourself while I was sleepy and high.  Please forgive me.) Once he discovered that I was able to keep liquids on my stomach for 24 hours, he released me from the IV and told me I was fine to go home this afternoon.

Dr. B came in around 12, and he happily released me as soon as he heard Dr. Colon released me.  I was so excited.

I got home at about 1 or 2.  I will stay here, in Apex, tonight because Dr. B wants to see me tomorrow.  He thinks it is best to stay here tonight just in case something goes wrong.  Also, he is going to take my staples out tomorrow.  I am supposed to call the office in the morning to schedule a time to see Dr. B.  After my appointment, he says he will allow me to go back to White Lake with my parents.  I’ll stay there until at least Friday.  I may come back to Apex on Friday to stay with Nick for the weekend.  (I’ll probably go back to White Lake on Sunday)  Dr. B says I will not be allowed to drive or work for two weeks, which feels pretty spot on right now.

Here are a few things about my past few days (more details to follow):

• WakeMed Cary was really great.  The staff was awesome.  From my prep nurses on Friday, to the nurse who cared from directly after my surgery, to the nurses and techs who cared for me during my stay–they were GREAT. We were especially thankful for Kristen and Beth on my first night, who were very gentle.  We really enjoyed Lindy, who was very friendly and added her own personal stories to help me through the past couple of days.  And, Lorilyn was an absolute angel when she saved me from my vomiting spell.
• I have a renewed respect for Dr. B.  He was really great this past week.  He has been very caring and very gentle with me.  He came to the hospital to check on me each day despite the fact that he was not on call.  He even gave us his private number to call in case I had another bad night.  I can’t stress enough how great he was.  Today my dad even said that he really liked Dr. B–that’s pretty great.
• We have received so much love and support over the past few weeks.  We are very grateful.  Thanks to everyone for you emails, text messages, facebook message, phone calls, flowers, and cards.

That’s all for now.  I’ll try to start to retrace the past few days to include some details.

The most important thing though, is that the bowel surgeon came in this morning and said two very awesome things:

1. Melody can have the IV Drip taken out, and she can go on solid foods
2. Melody can probably go home this afternoon.

We’re pretty excited about those two things.

He did make the comment that we may need to order a moving van though to remove all the stuff we’ve brought in.

So…right now we’re waiting on breakfast to arrive. Melody has attempted to interject and get them to bring some french toast instead of the cream of wheat. We’re not sure if they’ve updated their orders to reflect her new dietary allowances. So…in the next few minutes we’ll find out if she has to order something new, or if they get the new instructions in time.

I had a better night of sleep…still not great, but i also slept through from 1 to 6am.

Melody’s parents are getting breakfast for themselves at the moment, and we’re just hanging out here in the room. I’ll probably still switch shifts with them again this morning so i can go home, get some breakfast, take a shower (much needed), and watch the soccer. Then, in the early afternoon when Melody is supposed to be able to check out, i’ll head on back with a stack of moving boxes.

I left around 9:30am, handing over the reigns to Melody’s parents for the day. Upon arriving back, i found Melody in 500% better spirits, and feeling much better. I would describe her demeanor as having moved from ‘numb, headachy, hungover, completely overwhelmed by the surgery melody‘ to being ‘normal melody just dealing with a lot of pain.‘

Dr Brannon came by to check on her again, which was nice, and basically said that she would be good to go home already, EXCEPT, for the complications they had to deal with from the connection to the bowels.

Right now, the bowel surgeon specialist is the guy we’re waiting on to find out when she can go home. He comes by promptly at 6:30am every morning (the nurses say you can set your clock by him).

Melody is up to walking around the 3rd floor twice at a time now, still gingerly, but good that she’s walking that far without feeling nauseous.

She will be trying to forego the percoset tonight, as that really didn’t work out all that well last night. Instead she’s taking a mix of tylenol and toredol, which is significantly less debilitating.

I have brought back our DVD player though, and we have some shows to watch on there — Burn Notice, Psych — which should be better than surfing trough 100 channels of which only 2 have decent shows on.

So….tonight were hoping for a better, more restful night. I know I am hoping for that, and I know melody is hoping for it even more. I passed out at around 1pm today, and slept through 2 phone calls, my alarm, and the soccer, eventually waking up at 6:00pm. So….if i’m that tired, i know melody is more so.

Oh…one more thing….Dr Brannon did authorize outside food for her, which is awesome (for her). Not so awesome for those of us who have now moved to delivery boy status. So today, she had a peanut butter and banana shake from Cook Out, and tonight i brought back some organic apple sauce, a chocolate mousse yogurt thing, and some vegetable broth/soup. She’s definitely sick of the hospital food…saying it all tastes the same now.

Here’s 4 pictures from the event so far.

Hopefully the blog post from tomorrow morning will be even better.

Melody’s been up and walking around a few more times, which is good.

But just recently she started getting a pretty bad headache, and is now back to being nauseous. Obviously she’s getting some medication for it, but it’s a crappy thing to be feeling fairly okay, and then all of a sudden start going downhill again. But i think that’s going to be the state of things for the next 24 hours, as she moves to being more mobile, more independent.

I’m staying overnight again, and we’re both hoping that she’s able to sleep through the night. Melody has taken one of her two allowed percoset, and hopefully that will help knock her out a little, but this headache seems to be delaying things.

I didn’t get any sleep during the day today when i went back to the house, but i’m going to attempt to stay up a little longer each time….just because Melody seems to drift off to sleep, and then 5 minutes later she’s awake again. I’m hoping for her sake that she’s able to completely knock-out, and wake up in the morning after a full night’s sleep.

I’ve decided that i will partake in a little pudding from the nourishment room, where they have stocked it full of things for both patients and visitors. Melody’s been taking advantage of that and the free room service over the past 24 hours….getting things like her oatmeal, cream of wheat and stuff…..

The nourishment room has all kinds of things though….icy-pops, orange/apple/prune juice, vanilla/chocolate pudding, ginger ale, sprite, crackers, cereal, hot water, tea, coffee, milk…and it’s all complimentary, serve yourself.

Melody is feeling much better than this morning, but still not anywhere near 100%. She has been up and walking a little on her own (while holding the rollable IV-drip of course), and has been able to use the bathroom a few times too (which…according to the doctors is a very important step towards recovery).

She’s been able to eat jello, some vegetable broth, oatmeal, cream of wheat, and she’s continuing to drink hot water with lemon, ginger ale, ensure, plus lots and lots of water.

Her friends dropped off a little care package this morning, which was nice. Melody isn’t feeling well enough to take any phone calls or visitors still, so we appreciate the little things that people have done….text messages, emails etc.

I have brought back some flavored tea for her, so she’s really looking forward to that when she wakes up. Right now she’s resting again. I think she’s continuing to just sleep whenever she can, and just keep drifting in and out like that until things really start picking up.

She’s off the morphine…that was taken away this morning. She’s now on Percoset, which i think she doesn’t enjoy all that much….but it’s obviously better than nothing.

So…the plan for tonight is much like last night I think. Sleep as much as possible. Eat when she can. Use the bathroom as much as possible, and continue the climb back to 100%.

We’re still looking at Sunday as the checkout day i think, although i guess if things really go well tonight and tomorrow, it’s possible there could be a late checkout saturday. I don’t think that’s going to happen.

Some good news to look forward to:

Dr Brannon said she’ll be able to walk, and should walk as much as she can. Melody was worried that she’d be pretty much immobile for 6 weeks, but pretty much it’s only the first two weeks where she has to stay off her feet and recover (we think).

He also said that there’s no problem with her riding to White Lake with her parents when she checks out of here. Our plan is that melody will go to white lake for a couple of weeks while she recovers, and then at least she’ll have people around to help her during the days. I would have to be at work, so we thought White Lake would be a better destination rather than me deserting her during the work day.

I think that’s all the important details for now. Tomorrow depending on how she feels, we’ll consider taking phone calls, or making some phone calls.

If anyone is sending anything to the room, she is listed under her full name “Melody Caroline Smith Young,” or I can pass information along via email if anyone thinks they need the room number.

FYI — we’re still blocked from getting to facebook and flickr, so i’ll be uploading pictures and things when i get home (forgot to today though).

The nurses last night were great. Kristen and Beth were the opposite of what you might assume about graveyard shift staff. They were helpful, attentive, overly polite, consistently offered help when I could have done something for Melody myself. Really…they were great.

It might be the difference between them and the morning nurses that may be elevating Kristen and Beth in my mind, but really…they were pretty awesome.

The morning nurses so far though, have been fairly cold, and by the book. Not as much personality as the rest of the experience we’ve had. The perfect example was that Kristen and Beth helped Melody the whole way to get out of the bed for the first time, so she could attempt to use the bathroom. The nurses changed shifts while melody was up, and so by the time she had to go back to bed, there was a new person. This nurse (not sure of the name….maybe Angelica) kind of just stood back and almost expected Melody to just stand up, walk on back with a whistle and a grin, and hop back into bed.

We’re not quite at that stage yet.

But, i dont want to give a bad impression…just a difference in personalities i think. Overall…i think Melody would say shes been pretty happy with the treatment….as much as you can when everything makes you nauseous.

She’s been upgraded to a “full” liquid diet, which for some weird reason includes oatmeal, yogurt, cream of wheat, and pudding. Again…not sure how they categorize things here, but those things don’t sound like liquids…not even “full” liquids.

So…the plan for today is that Melody will continue to try and get up and use the bathroom (now that she’s sans-catheter). They want her to get up and walk around when she’s able to without throwing up.

So now it’s just a waiting game. I’ll switch off with melody’s parents this morning at some stage after i get the full report from Dr Brannon (he’s due here around 9am). I’ll head home for a shower, some food and to do some work in between trips back to the hospital.

Melody is still nowhere near well enough for phone calls, but will definitely be in here until at least Saturday. We don’t know yet if she’ll be here through Saturday night yet though.

She was pretty drugged up, but in some fairly bad pain (an 8 out of 10 on the smiley to frowny face scale) according to her. She’s a trooper though, and is dealing with it well.

She’s allowed to have clear liquids, no food, which includes jello (wierd…i know…not clear at all), water, ice, apple juice (also not clear), and that’s about it.

Apparently she asked if she can have broth….and they said yes…but they don’t have vegetable broth. So we’ll investigate that tomorrow if i can bring some in for her.

Melody’s been enjoying the morphine drip that she controls (one push every 8 minutes). Now… Melody must have lost the ability to track time, because she kept hitting that button every 30 seconds wondering why it wasn’t 8 minutes yet.

She’s dealt with a lot of nausea, some bad itching (the medication does that to you) and general feeling bad, but she’s pushing through well. They gave her some benedryl for the itching, which allowed her to sleep for a couple of hours.

As soon as they gave her the benedryl, we left for some dinner. We had stayed with her until around 8:00pm, and then left to get some dinner. In solidarity, we hadn’t eaten since breakfast. Melody hasn’t been able to eat since midnight last night (or drink either).

So….now I’m back at the hospital where i’ll stay with her for the night. She is wide awake, chowing down on some jell, ginger ale (another colored liquid….seriously….they don’t even try to stay consistent), and we’re watching some tv.

I’ve brought Harry Elephanté as per her request, and loaded the MP3 player with her favorites — Franti, Mofro, Band of Heathens, John Mayer, Pearl Jam….and more.

The room is decorated with some flowers, courtesy of the Aussie Youngs, and the card they sent too.

So….it’s about time for bed….but I’ll wait and see how Melody feels. Basically the plan is to stay up when she’s up, and sleep when she sleeps. I am not quite sure of the check-in schedule with the nurses yet, but i’m sure she won’t be allowed to sleep for too long so quickly after surgery.

I’m sure this will be a long night, but at least we’re on the road to recovery.

Thanks again to everyone for the text messages, voicemails, offers of support and help. We really appreciate it.

Tomorrow, depending on how Melody feels, we’ll consider taking some phone calls, but at this stage, that is completely out of the question. So….unfortunately for everyone out there…..you have to put up with my description of the proceedings.

Its 4:53pm right now.

She went into surgery at around 1:45pm. She was out of surgery at approximately 3:15pm. I got back from my meeting at 4, and her Mom (Jessie) filled in me in on the details as follows.

The surgery went well, although it was more complicated than they expected. The cysts were attached, or something was attached to her bowels, making the doctor need to call in an additional surgeon.

But…things went really well, and everything is cleared up. She didn’t lose any blood, and is recovering as i write this quickly.

We are waiting for her to get to her recovery room now.

The doctor is positive that the things they removed are 100% the cause of us not getting pregnant. So…he said that she would be able to conceive naturally after she recovers. Because of the complications with the bowels, they are worried they may have nicked something, and so she’ll be on a liquid diet for the next couple of days, and they might need to keep her here under observation until Sunday.

She may need to have a histerectomy later in life, but they said that won’t happen until we have 3 naturally born and conceived children (BIG SMILES FROM ME HEARING THIS). They did say though, that she would be a prime candidate for IVF now, which is nice, considering that other study we’re looking at.

So…now we wait.

Things are looking good, but she’s apparently all hopped up on morphine, so we’re not sure how aware she is of what happened, and what the results are.

[update] As of right now, Melody is still in quarantine/post-surgery area where no one can see her. When she wakes up, she’ll be transferred upstairs to her recovery room, which is really nice…..LCD TV, private room, Free Wifi, pull out couch YAY ME!

Thanks for all the well wishes. Will keep you posted here and through the SpawnWatch twitter account.

I will be posting here, to the SpawnWatch category, as well as tweeting from the SpawnWatch account, if you follow that.

So….good thoughts, good prayers, good whatevers that you do….Melody will appreciate the good [fill-in-the-blank] coming her way over the next 48 hours.

I’ll be there at the hospital at the beginning, but will be leaving for a work meeting around 1:45pm, then coming back as soon as it’s over.

The schedule is as follows:

Thursday 11:30am’ish….
head to the hospital.

Thursday 2:00pm’ish…
head into surgery

Thursday 2:00pm + who knows how long……
get out of surgery

Thursday 4:00pm….
Nick gets back to the hospital, hopefully to find Melody wide awake and yelling at him for not tweeting or texting or calling people already

Thursday night…
stay overnight in the hospital…(Nick will stay with melody)….Melody’s parents will be staying at the house looking after the dogs

Friday…
don’t know yet. Possibly Nick goes back to work, possibly stays at the hospital, possibly works from home. Melody continues to recover.

Friday night…
don’t know yet….possibly Nick stays overnight again, depending on how Melody’s recovery is progressing, and if she’ll even know I’m there.

Saturday…
Melody is discharged from the hospital and we make the BIG decision about whether her belly button ring goes back in or not.

So…now you know what we know.

Thanks for all the good thoughts and well wishes already.

I went back to Dr. B on Monday, June 7th.  The plan was as such: If the cysts were gone, I may be able to go back on the meds and proceed with IUI and possibly the dye test.  Unfortunately, since I was unable to see him until day 4 of my cycle, it would have likely been too late for me to start the meds this month or complete another IUI.  Of course, we were hoping the cysts were gone.  Unfortunately, I went in knowing this was pretty damn unlikely.  They were very painful this month (mainly during the first few weeks of my cycle), I tried to convince myself (before Saturday) that this meant the cysts were getting smaller (ie. raging against the shrinking).  On Saturday morning, I awoke to the most horrible pain of my life.  Seriously, the worst pain I have ever felt.  I had shooting pains in my ovarian-area.  It basically felt like there was an evil devil in my womb twisting whatever he could find.  I was doubled over in pain and nearly unable to catch my breath.  I call downstairs to ask Nick to bring me some pain-killers; I actually called our house number from my cell phone because I could not imagine being able to speak loud enough for Nick to hear me from upstairs.  I took 2 super pain killers and put a heating pad on.  Then I just sat in pain for what seemed like a decade, but was probably 10-20 minutes.  The heating pad worked a wonderful miracle and the pain got slightly better.  I spent the rest of the morning with my heating pad in place.  I finally left my bed (and moved to the couch–Yay me) about 2 hours later and decided I may be able to remove the heating pad. This was potentially one of the worst ideas I have ever had in my life.  I took the heating pad off and within 20 minutes the hellish pain was back and worse than before.  Of course, I put my savior, the heating pad back on, and did not make the mistake of removing it again for 24 hours.  I knew the cysts were still in place.  At one point, I actually thought one had burst because of the pain.  I spent the rest of the weekend in awful pain, nauseous with a pounding headache, and super medicated.  I also had to keep the gates of hell on my stomach at all times.  (The heating pad makes for a very hot day and night.)  I think the word miserable sums the weekend of June 4-6.

I did not expect good news from the doctor’s office.  My appointment was at 11:30, and I could not get out of bed on Monday to go to work.  It took me over an hour to get dressed for my appointment because I had to take breaks in my dressing process to put the heating pad back on.  (I kept thinking–you have got to make yourself look decent.  You cannot go to the doctor’s office looking like this; people will think you are dying.)  I looked pretty rough.  I was too nauseous, so I didn’t eat before I left home.  (Big mistake.)  I arrive right on time and waited to be called back.  After waiting for about half an hour, it was nearly my turn.  (I knew this because it was almost time for the office to close for lunch and I was one of only 2 people waiting.)  Then the nurse came in and said “Sorry ladies, but Dr. B just left to go deliver a baby.  He will be back in about 30 minutes.”  Normally, this means the waiting room erupts into applause, which I never understand.  (I’m not unhappy that a lady is giving birth, but I really don’t get the applause thing.) Luckily, my fellow waiting room companion did not clap, so I didn’t feel awkward simply sitting there.  I waited a few minutes thinking only of my empty stomach and increasingly dizzy head.  Finally, I asked the nurse if she thought I had enough time to grab a bite to eat.  I ran as fast as I could to Whole Foods (lifting my previous purchasing embargo) to find food.  I returned to the waiting room, yogurt parfait in hand, to find the door was locked.  My waiting room friend let me in and looked at my parfait like she was considering bonking me over the head for it.  She even inquired about it.  “Where had I gotten it? What was it? How had I left?”  I chose not to say”Back off lady I’m starving.”  I simply answered her questions and said “I asked to leave; I’m here a lot; they know me.”  (That’s right friends, I pulled the frequent OB-GYN flier card.)

I finally got called back for my ultrasound.  On the way back the nurse was quite concerned about it being day four of my cycle because this may mean I couldn’t do meds and IUI this month.  I stopped her and said, “Oh, no need to worry.  The cysts are still there; there’s no need for meds this month.”  She looked at me like I was crazy, so I in turn gave her the “wanna bet” look.  When Dr. B came in, he ask how I was feeling, and I said, “well, I’m feeling pretty good considering I haven’t left the house since Saturday.  But, I think you’ll be unhappy when you get that ultrasound in place.”  Turns out I was right.  The cysts are still there, and Dr. B was unhappy.  About 2 seconds in he said, “That’s that.  We’re doing surgery.”  I was prepared for surgery, but I wasn’t so prepared for what came next.  “I may not be able to do this laparoscopically; I’m worried that they are too big.”  The plan on Monday was to go in through my belly button and attempt laparoscopic surgery ASAP to remove the cysts.  He continues to be concerned about their size and how they continue to grow.  Apparently, the fact that they are so big in only two cycles of Femara makes it unlikely that these cysts were caused by the meds.  Additionally, they should not be growing since I am no longer on the meds.  I left the office in pretty good spirits because there is a chance that without the cysts we may have some success with spawning.

Dr. B’s office called on Wednesday to let me know my surgery is set for Thursday, June 17th at 1:30.  I am to arrive at WakeMed at 11:30 and I am not allowed to eat or drinking anything from midnight on.  (I’m hungry and thirsty just thinking about it.)  My pre-op appointment was today.  Prepare yourself–this is when it gets depressing….

I went in for my pre-op appointment with Dr. B today.  It was scheduled at 2:15.  I was supposed to me at the hospital for pre-op at 3:15.  The office had to call the hospital to postpone me because I did not finish at Dr. B’s until 3:30.  He did another internal ultrasound, and found the cysts had gotten slightly larger.  As soon as he got the ultrasound in place he told me that plans had changed.  He no longer plans to attempt the laparoscopic surgery.  Instead he intends to make a small incision along my bikini line and remove the cysts this way.  He explained it will basically be like a c-section–without the resulting baby.  He is concerned that I have endometriosis.  The last few months he thought the cysts were the results of the medications, but last week he seemed unconvinced.  Apparently in the last week he has decided it is unlikely these are merely a result of femara.  Instead he thinks this is a larger issue.  If he attempts laparoscopic surgery and the cysts are endometriosis, then there are several risks.  Dr. B thinks the best option is to remove these guys with an incision.  I think–do what you have to do.

I will have to spend two nights in the hospital.  (I’m not happy; I do not like sleeping in strange places.)  The recovery time is longer for this surgery.  Full recovery will take 6 weeks.  Dr. B says I am not allowed to drive or work for 1 week (probably 2).  I asked when I could start running again (because I like to run) and he quickly said, “six weeks, no running for six weeks.”  I also can’t ride my bike.  Insert Sad Face Here.  (Okay, so I am going to be bored and pudgy with a baby-less c-section.  This summer is going to be awesome.)

My pre-op at the hospital was pretty interesting. The commitment to confusion in Day Patient at WakeMed did not instill great confidence in me.  I’m hoping Thursday goes smoother.  I keep reminding myself that I was very emotional, and this can make everything more dramatic.  The nurse who covered my pre-op info was very nice.  She did freak me out when she started with, “Well, your orders have changed.  Now we are doing exploratory surgery to remove both ovaries.”  (Wow, Nelly.  Hit the brakes.)  I quickly replied, on the verge of tears, “no, no, no, ovarian cysts not OVARIES.  I need the ovaries.”

Of course, they covered all the other important questions.  Who is bringing me to the appointment, am I allergic to anything, am I positive am not pregnant.  (I considered screaming–no, not pregnant!! after the 15th time she asked, but decided it would make me look crazy.)  She also asked me if I was on drugs.  I couldn’t help myself; I had to ask, “do people honestly tell you yes?”  Apparently, they do.  She asked me if I had any special religious preferences, and I said, “Not really, I’m Catholic, so if something goes wrong, call a priest.”  She kind pushed that to the side, and said, “oh, that won’t be an issue.”  However, I’m thinking, 1-you asked. 2-I just signed a form recognizing that surgery is not an exact science and I may die, so maybe you put call a priest in the computer.  (Additionally, isn’t medicine a science.  What exactly are we considering an exact science these days if medicine doesn’t fall into that category.)

So I am on for Thursday at 1:30.  Nick has a big meeting at 2:00, so I think he may be there when they take me in, but he will have to leave; I should be out of surgery when he comes back.  My parents are coming, so I will not be alone.  Right now, I am thinking that I’ll go back to White Lake with them, so I’m not at home by myself during the 1-2 weeks that I cannot drive, and Nick must work.  Nick or I will update the blog after the surgery, so keep an eye out for updates.  I’m hoping the hospital has wireless, so I can blog whilst in pain (considerable pain if the nurse I spoke to today is correct.)

Things of concern or unhappies:

• Endometriosis freaks me out.  I know a few people who have had it and they were unable to conceive naturally.  (There is a chance that I may be able to get into an egg freezing study to reduce the cost of IVF.  I’ve been talking to a new doctor about her study.  We are really hoping for this now.  I’ll post more on this later.)  Unfortunately, I have seen some disturbing info on endometriosis leading to infertility.  (Here’s hoping we are able to remain reproductively challenged and we don’t move to infertile.)  I’m trying not to thinking about this right now.
• I went for my first appointment before we started “trying” with concerns that I had endometriosis.  A big part of my wishes I had been more vocal about my concerns.  I am confident that my previous doctor did what he could do with my questions, but I can’t help but wonder if these cysts have been in place for a long time, and maybe we could have taken them out already.  (This makes me really concerned that they have scar tissue or something else awful around them.  Again, trying not to think about this right now.)
• We are kind of worried about the cost, but we’ll figure it out.
• I was supposed to run the Susan B. Komen Race for the Cure 5K on Saturday.  I couldn’t because I was in too much pain, and I was worried I would pop an ovary.  I am super bummed.  I trained for 4 weeks.  Luckily, it isn’t completely my ovaries fault.  (I’m worried they may get a complex if I keep blaming them for everything.) I hurt my knee two weeks ago, and it still isn’t right.  I’ll have plenty of time for it to get better while I’m recovering from my surgery.

Random things:

• On Thursday I have to remove my last remaining tie to my carefree youth–my belly button ring.  It must be removed before surgery, and I will not be putting it back in.  I’m officially letting the young, crazy, mid-drift wearing girl of my past go.  I’ve had it for 13 years–wow I’m old. (Maybe I need one more picture of the ring before I say so long.)
• Today, whilst leaving my urine sample, I thought there has got to be an easier way to go this.  I was seriously considering how I could turn this thought into my million-dollar scheme.  I am personally tired of peeing on myself every 2-4 weeks.  I know what you’re thinking–what no talent ass clown pees on herself every time she leaves a sample.  Me okay.  I pee on my hand every time, and then I feel obligated to clean the cup before I put it in the secret pee-closet.  (That’s the place where your sample waits to be analyzed in Dr. B’s office.  I thought this was special to his office, but the pre-op area had one too; I think it is standard now.)  Anyway just when I was coming up with ways to change the face of urine samples for ladies, BAM.  The pre-op people burst my bubble.  They gave me a sample cup with a funnel attached–genius.  (The funnel was oddly shaped, but awesome nonetheless–urine free hands for my second sample of the day.)  Why didn’t I think of that?  Also, why doesn’t Dr. B’s office have these?  I’m thinking about bringing my own funnel next time.
• As I waited to begin my pre-op stuff today.  A random man came by singing a random song.  He went right up to the desk where I had to check-in and started signing to the desk clerk.  She did not seem to like it.  It was awkward for me; I didn’t want to cut him off because he had a nice voice, but I feel like it was not the right place to break into song. It was weird.

What I’m looking forward to:

• Buying some new fun PJs for the hospital/recovery.
• Reading a few crappy novels–I’m open for suggestions.
• Watching crap TV for the next few weeks–again send suggestions.

Well, that’s all for now.  If you can send me some prayers or happy thoughts on Thursday; that would be super.